Response to 'Act Like a Lady, Think Like a Man'

For my non-fiction book, I chose a book written by Steve Harvey. It's called "Act Like a Lady, Think Like a Man." This title caught my attention while reading through the New York Times Bestseller list.

Overall, I enjoyed reading this book. I also learned a lot about the opposite sex; it was almost as if I found a copy of their playbook! However, I think this book was not targeted at seventeen-year-old girls. I felt like Harvey was frequently referring to topics that do not pertain to teenagers, such as myself. He talked a lot about how to introduce your boyfriend to your children, sexual stuff, etc. Don't get me wrong, he did give lots of beneficial advice on these important aspects of a relationship. I felt like Harvey wrote this book for single women in their upper twenties to mid-thirties who have children and are desperately looking for "the one," but having no such luck. Hopefully his wisdom will help these ladies out! Also, there were lots of examples of situations, etc. that Harvey seemed to cater to the African-American race that wouldn't really help out a white person like me. Obviously this is because Steve Harvey is African-American, so he knows a thing or two about it!

One thing that I did not enjoy much was Steve Harvey's personal stories. Some of them were necessary to support his beliefs, but it seemed like some were just filler stories. For example, he would write about ex-girlfriends and his experience with them, but it didn't do anything beneficial for his book. There weren't really any lessons he learned, the point of those stories were basically, "I dated this girl, and she wasn't the one for me."

All negative opinions aside, I thoroughly did enjoy reading "Act Like a Lady, Think Like a Man." It was nice to find out that men generally think the same, as opposed to how complex every woman is. I'll save you the lengthy summary (for now--I'm sure we'll be discussing the books in class.) Harvey covered every aspect of a relationship in this book, including: how men think, how men love, what men need, what scares men, playthings vs. the marrying type, mama's boys, cheating, standards, the ninety-day rule, meeting your kids, strong women, how to get the ring, and a q&a chapter filled with answers women have been longing for.

My favorite chapter in the book was titled 'Strong, Independent--and Lonely--Women.' I enjoyed it because it had so much valuable information, a story that made me cry, and some of Harvey's viewpoints that I totally disagree with. Harvey states that women are the driving force of men--without us, men would be filthy animals living off beer and pizza and going to strip clubs all the time. Men are looking for a woman to love and take care of. In Harvey's words, "To us, your power comes from one simple thing: you're a woman, and we men will do anything humanly possible to impress you so that, ultimately, we can be with you. . . You're the ultimate prize to us." The upsetting thing for Harvey and other men around the world is that women want to be very independent. I greatly disagree with this whole section of the chapter. Harvey states that women these days have been raised to believe that women aren't seen as that important to men and that they should get great jobs and be independent women, even if it means denying a serious relationship. Of course, all men want to "protect, provide, and profess" their love for women, but we make it impossible to do so when we refuse them the opportunity to protect and provide because we're strong and independent. Harvey states that at some point, women need to back down and just be a 'lady.' Let a man take care of you because that's what he genuinely wants to do. Harvey says being a lady is a lost art form--it's time to relax and let men do the hard work while we sit back and appreciate them. I translated this to, "Women should act cute and helpless while men do all the dirty work." Hmm...does this remind anyone of the Mary Wollstonecraft essay? She stated that women SHOULDN'T act like this--and I totally agree with her!! I believe that a strong, independent woman is happier than a weak, dependent woman. We don't need men to make us happy!

Even though I didn't agree with Harvey on this, he did share a personal story that made me realize that some women are WAY too overboard about being independent. One of Harvey's friends was at the grocery store and all he wanted was one bottle of pineapple juice (his favorite.) THAT'S IT...ONE BOTTLE. When his girlfriend was turned away, he grabbed the bottle and put it in the cart. She immediately discovered the juice and went balistic. He replied that the juice was all he wanted to be happy, and what did she do in return? She spit at him and said, "You've got no money!" Then smashed the glass bottle of pineapple juice at his feet, and stormed away. The man left the store and obediently sat next to her car, tears in his eyes. He loyally helped her load the groceries, even though he was hurt. This woman didn't allow the man a chance to provide for her, so shortly after he left her. Maybe I'm just a very sensitive or emotional person, but this story brought tears to my eyes.

Overall, this book was very beneficial for me to read. I think once I'm looking to get married I will read it again. Every woman should reading this book before getting into a serious relationship! Thank you Steve Harvey for writing the key to a happy relationship!!